Adjusting to the New (warning a little venty... I mean no offense)

So it may seem that life has hit the point where it's time to adjust to new things: Holidays without grandpa there, new insurance plans, new work programs, a new show; some things it takes little effort for me to adjust to, others I fight the adjustment the whole way.

This Thanksgiving was our first family holiday since Grandpa passed away. I can admit that I am not one who deals well with group emotion, sometimes I don't have a handle on personal emotion, so group is a little too much for me at most times. This Thanksgiving started with a little extra sleep and then a phone call from my dad letting me know that my brother was sick and in instacare so they were picking up the kids and I needed to go buy some baby food for Maelie. Ok no problem, I needed to pick up my appetizer supplies anyway. I come home and play with the kids, prepare my artichoke dip, hang out in bed and am feeling fairly ok about the day. Maelie needed her diaper changed so I laid her on my bed, like we do, was in the process of changing her, and the cute little runt peed on my bed. I know I should be thankful she's a girl so it wasn't on my walls and on me. But now I'm beginning to feel the holiday frustration. My dad says throw my bedspread in the washer, my mom says it's too big. So I get the upholstrey cleaner and lay the bedspread out and begin cleaning it by hand. I head over to grandma's with my dip, plug it in in the kitchen and go to the other room to play with the kids. A few people eat a very small amount of dip in the kitchen but not a lot because the kitchen is crowded and people just can't hang out in their eating the dip. No worries I think people can scoop some up on their plates when we dish up our dinner. Come to find out, we are having dinner family style this year. We have had buffet style for as long as I can remember, but this year we are trying something new (seeing me kicking and screaming into new) so the four of us and the four great grandkids who aren't in the dining room are dishing up buffet style while the food is being passed around the table family style in the dining room, and at least 2/3 of my dip remains in the kitchen uneaten. Frustration has already been decided on at this point for me and so I'm sure my family wanted to kill me. The other family members come over for pie after, little kids are running around, and then being told not to run around and the cycle continues. People asking about why I'm not dating and that I work too much...(two of my very favorite topics...) I had decided earlier in the day that I was going to bring my DVD player home that night (it's been there since Grandpa passed away) so when I say I plan to take it home I get the are you kidding me look. Thankfully the night ends on a good note with a Christmas movie night by the glow of my Christmas tree. Maybe I'm not meant for change in holidays, or holidays in general... I'm trying to find a new outlook for the upcoming Christmas holiday so that it might be more pleasant for all involved. (I say all because I know that it's not easy being around me most of the time, but especially not in the frustration cycle)

Things at work: Well at Hale, the transition of a new show went very smoothly. I miss having everyone from Woods around but I am happy that Christmas Carol is here and that so far we are getting out of working much more earlier each night. And I mean I still have my Jon McBride and Ryan at the theatre so it's all pretty good. And in the middle of the transition we had our staff meeting and my team won the game! I love winning!

Things at my other work: We found out yesterday we are changing insurance carriers, which doesn't really change much for me. We still aren't on an IHC carrier so I still don't really go to the doctor, I think I'm two and a half years overdo for a physical, but I feel well enough. I am thankful for a company that provides insurance in the case that one day I do need it. We are also getting a new program to generate purchase orders. It is still very new, it won't go live until January but in the mean time we are entering things and playing around in it to be prepared for the complete switch come January 2nd. Can I just say, currently I think the program is a nightmare. Sarah reminded me how when facebook changed not a lot of people were huge fans but you learn to adjust, and it's true I don't really even remember the old facebook and maybe in time I will think this new program is the genius of all programs, but I am not looking forward to the next week or so with the IT developers constantly standing over my shoulder seeing how it's coming and what's not working and coming by and standing and staring every two minutes waiting to see if I have something to enter. Really, it drives me to near insanity.

And now some highlights of the past couple weeks because really I sound like a crazy person, and my life isn't always crazy frustrating on the verge of tears.

I went and saw Savior of the World again last week with my mom and grandma. They loved it, it was the first time seeing it for both of them. I have seen it once already this year and once the first year it came out. PC did a wonderful job, but really I didn't expect anything less from him. That night I also had the opportunity to walk around and see the lights on temple square. I am a complete sucker for Christmas lights, they bring such joy to me.

Tonight, I am going to see A Christmas Carol at Hale, and tomorrow I am seeing Plaid Tidings in Midvale. I've been working a lot-ish, because that's what I do and because I really don't mind it the majority of the time. I am doing well to stay on track to lose my five pounds before Christmas, and then to maintain it. Which is sometimes hard to do considering they feed us practically ever two hours at Hale (for which I really am grateful, they make us wonderful food. I just remind myself it's all about portion sizes!) I haven't decided if I'm going to do my monthly weigh in this week or next, but either way I think I should be in a place that I feel excited about.

Well that's about it. Sorry you had to listen to my venting, but that's what a blog is to release what you are thinking or feeling... so there you have it.